14 Ways Guaranteed To Make You Happier

There is one thing that I can categorically say about you without any fear of contradiction.
And I know it because you are a Human Being and leaving DNA to one side, it’s one of the few things that binds every person on the planet.
I know you want to he happy.
It’s integral to you as a person and so hard wired that nothing you can do will ever change the fact. Even miserable people want to be happy, although you could be forgiven for thinking otherwise sometimes.
Research into happiness and positive psychology is relatively speaking a new field in science and as such under-researched compared to more established fields.
Science has tended, historically speaking, to look for what was wrong and then try and fix it.
Positive psychology looks for what is right and replicates it.

Your happiness is largely within your control.

About 50% is set at birth by your genetics and if you have severe depression there’s a good chance it’s in your genes. That doesn’t necessarily mean you can’t overcome it, but it will be harder.
Even though most people presume it’s much higher, only a measly 10% of your happiness levels are environmental, meaning where you live, what job you do, how much money you earn, what car you drive etc
The remaining 40% is down to your thoughts and general attitude and for the vast majority of people, there is enough room in that 40% to make them happy.
Today I am going to share with you 14 things that can seriously help you increase your overall happiness levels.
A word of warning though. Even though adopting the following practices will make you a happier person overall, understand that happiness will always come and go and sometimes being sad is appropriate.

1. Align With Your Core Values

You may think I bang on about core values because I wrote a book on them when in actuality the reverse is true.
I wrote the book because I know how important they are.
I have never had a client that didn’t get something out of understanding their own core values, and many got genuine A-ha! moments.
In my opinion, you simply cannot be anything other than happy and content if you’re living a life in alignment with your values and this is the most under-rated work in Life Coaching.

2.. Give Back

There is a part of your brain called the nucleus accumbens (actually there are two, one in each hemisphere) that play a large part in sending reward and pleasure signals out.
Unfortunately, it also plays a large role in addiction and this is the area of the brain that turns into a Pink Floyd light show when somebody takes a strong stimulant like cocaine.
However, latest brain research has demonstrated that it also lights up, if not quite as intensely,  when we help other people.
How cool is that? Donating to a charitable cause achieves the same aim as doing coke!
And not only does it give that initial feel of well-being, but it also lasts a lot longer than the coke and it won’t have you crawling around on your hands and knees trying to scrape together one more line, or claiming you have tiger blood in your veins.

3. Deny Yourself Instant Gratification

I covered this in my post Life Coaching Challenge.
In brief, it means if you postpone instant gratification for long-term gain, then you will see your overall happiness levels start to climb

4. Set Goals

Goal setting and moving toward achieving those goals can be a very rewarding experience.
However, there is one massive caveat. The goals have to be intrinsically motivated and they can’t be all or nothing goals.
Intrinsically means they come from deep within, i.e. they’re aligned with your values and they are meaningful to you!
And by all or nothing, I mean you have to enjoy the journey as much as the destination.
Imagine you set a goal to win a gold medal at the 2020 Olympics and bust your nuts accordingly making the run up to 2020 a miserable one for you and those close to you.
What if you then only get the silver medal? You’re probably going to want to shoot yourself.
Happy people tend not to shoot themselves.
Note: I f you want to know how to set goals that stick. Sign up fro my newsletter on the left and I’ll wing you a copy of the ebook I wrote on it.

5. Avoid Adaptation

The reason why rich people are no happier statistically speaking than people who are just ok for money is because of hedonic adaptation.
Whatever your circumstances are you will adapt to them and they will become the norm. Which is why that sexy, shiny new car is just a car after a few weeks.
Avoiding adaptation is difficult, but it can be done if you can be mindful and grateful for what you do have both materially and with relationships.
Remind yourself of what you have on a regular basis and stop taking it for granted. I’m sure you’d like more, but unless you’re bankrupt, have no family or friends and are about to die a slow and agonizing death, I feel sure you have things to be grateful for.
Also, remember that adaption tends to happen with material objects and people rather than experiences.
You may love your new 27” iMac (and i know I do!), but you will adapt to it and using that money on a family vacation or even hiring a Life Coach (seriously) may do more for your long-term happiness levels.

6. Do Worthwhile Work

I can’t ever remember working with a client who loved her job and was unhappy. You spend half your waking life at work and if you believe your work is worthwhile you will be a happier person.
You don’t necessarily have to be a Nurse, Fireman, Police Officer, Teacher, Charity Worker or a member  of any of the other professions that we tend to think of socially as being worthwhile.
If you’re a gardener, being the best gardener you can be and helping brighten peoples lives is enough. If you cut hair, take pride in making people happy with what you do.
Even if you’re an accountant, you can make sure that you view your job as helping people avoid paying too much money to the IRS.
It’s a matter of where you focus, because most jobs can be viewed as worthwhile with a little bit of creative thinking and reframing.
Cliche warning: If you don’t do the job you love, love the job you do.

7. Meditate/Pray

Some people get confused when I lump meditation and prayer together, but their effects on the brain are very similar.
And those effects are highly beneficial to everything from mental and physical health to happiness levels.
Oh and by the way, religious people tend to be happier than atheists too (see below).

8. Socialize

There used to be a belief that religious people tended to be happier because of their faith in God and belief in the afterlife.
However, new research has suggested this may not be the case and it may have more to do with forming strong social bonds with people that have similar values and beliefs.
You are a social animal whether you like it or not and the more people you are strongly bonded to that share similar (non-destructive) aims, the more likely you are to be happy.
This doesn’t mean you have to run out and join your local Church, nor does it mean you should be down the pub getting hammered every night.
But it does mean if you shun social interaction and like to be a lone wolf you are less likely to be happy with your life.

9. Smile

A genuine smile sends a signal to your brain that you’re happy. That in and of itself is cool, but it gets way cooler.
When your brain notices that signal it then sends another signal that it’s happy to be happy and starts a happiness spiral.
Of course the opposite is also true and that is what most people seem to have mastered more successfully

10. Exercise

Glaringly obvious I know, but it would be remiss of me not to mention exercise.
Cardiovascular work-outs creates all sorts of metabolic changes within the body as well as improving self-esteem and leading to a sense of achievement.
Endorphins, substances remarkably close to morphine are produced, which create a sense of well-being.
There is also an increase in dopamine production and it is this, that has scientists now believing exercise can help prevent and/or slow down the onset of Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s disease.
Another great reason to get your ass to the gym!

11. Be Less Attached

Shortly after 9/11 I flew to Miami from the UK with my wife for a vacation.
I used to always carry my toilet bag and spare set of clothing in my hand luggage in case our bags went missing.
In that toilet bag was a Swiss Army knife my parents had bought me for my 10th birthday that I had forgotten about.
It showed up on the x-ray machine and a miserable bastard of a security guard started turning my bag upside down obviously expecting to find an AK-47 and a RPG launcher in there too.
Needless to say he didn’t, but he did confiscate my 30 year old knife.
My wife was distraught and all the more so as my dad had only recently died and she was close to him.
It’s just a knife I said. It’s not my dad, or my mum, it’s just a knife. The guy didn’t take any of my memories or anything that couldn’t be replaced.
Being attached to material objects is a recipe for misery because everything breaks, gets lost, stolen or simply wears out at some stage, including you I’m sorry to say.

12. Don’t Compare

If you’re really not arsed about this happiness malarkey then I suggest you start comparing yourself to other people.
If you earn $100k per annum compare yourself to the person earning $200k. If you’re overweight compare yourself to the gorgeous slim girl at the gym. And if you’re sick, focus on all the selfish bastards that are currently in good health.
As I said in my first book, Don’t Ask Stupid Questions, comparison doesn’t deliver contentment. So stop comparing yourself to others because there will always be people with more money, better looking, cleverer, fitter, taller and funnier than you!

13. Flow

You have heard of the flow state, right? That time when you are so engrossed in what you’re doing that you lose all track of time, even all track of self.
People who regularly tap into the flow state, tend to be happier.
So presuming the activity isn’t self-destructive or requires you to spend 30 hours straight playing World of Warcraft and gets you fired from your job, look for things that get you in the flow.

14. Love Yourself And Others

Happy people don’t beat themselves or other people up. Happy people tend to be loving people. Give love to yourself and others and you’ll be amazed at how happier you feel about life.