What It Takes to Form a Good Habit

Make Sure Your Life Is In Order

 

While there's a certain charm to the "no better time than now" idea behind forming good habits, the fact of the matter is that your willpower is limited. Psychology Today recommends waiting until your life is in order (at least somewhat) before forming a new habit. If stressed, working on some other form of personal growth, or otherwise not in a normal daily routine, you'll find it much harder to keep up with a good habit.

Focus on One Good Habit

We won't sugarcoat it for you: forming good habits can be tough. Habits are something that are deeply ingrained in our behavior, which is why quitting a bad habit is so hard. Similarly, starting up a good habit is going to take a lot of work and conditioning before it becomes something automatic. If you try to take on too much at once, you are probably setting yourself up for failure. So focus on just one good habit for now—even if it's a small one—and move on to the others later.

Work Yourself Into It Gradually

While your goal may be to end up doing something every day (like, say, exercising), it's unlikely that you're going to be able to reach that goal right out of the gate. It's going to take time and willpower to condition yourself, so don't beat yourself up if you miss days at the beginning. Start ramping up that good habit gradually for a more successful habit forming.
That means setting goals for yourself. If you can set a different goal each week or so, you can motivate yourself without getting overwhelmed. Try exercising just two or three days the first week, then set a slightly higher goal for the next week, and so on. As you get more used to the act of exercising during the day, it'll become easier for you to work toward your end goal of working out every day. Once you do, keep it up—the more consistently you can stick with it, the more you'll want to keep going.

Piggyback it With Other, Already-Formed Habits or Routines

eHow recommends "piggybacking" your desired habits with other habits or routines you already have. Say you want to start flossing daily. Flossing is one of those habits that we neglect more often because we forget, rather than us just being lazy. Put the floss in a conspicuous place by your toothbrush, and every time you brush your teeth, grab the floss and do a quick run-through. Similarly, if you want to start taking vitamins, stick the bottle in your coffee mug so every time you go to make your coffee in the morning, you can pop your multivitamin for the day.

Get an Accountability Buddy

We've talked about this before, and it's an oldie but a goodie: get a buddy to help you stay accountable. Motivating yourself to go to the gym every day or start eating better can be difficult when you're on your own, but if you have someone else around with whom you can exercise or eat with often, you're more likely to keep up with those activities.

Give It Time

When you decide on that final goal, it can seem a bit overwhelming ("I want to exercise every day...for the rest of my life"). Once you turn a resolution into a habit, though, things will get a lot easier, because it will become routine.
You've probably heard it takes 21 days for a habit to form, but that isn't necessarily true. Depending on the habit (and the person), it could take longer. Give yourself a trial run to work out the kinks, and keep up your motivation until that behavior becomes a habit—which could take a couple months. Eventually, you should find that things get easier. That habit will become automatic instead of something you need to force yourself to do.