Have you ever met someone who could get you to do anything? I have, and I’ve always craved this seemingly out-of-reach ability.
There
are countless books and college courses that all claim to hold the keys
to persuasion. They’re valuable resources for learning how to persuade,
but they tend to overcomplicate the matter and ignore practical methods
of communicating effectively with people.
You
don’t have to be a master salesman with endless confidence in order to
be more persuasive. You simply need to pay closer attention to the
basics so that you can twist the odds of success in your favor.
1. Make your words powerful.
The
pitch itself needs to be full of words that actually elicit a response.
You can do this easily by framing your statements around key phrases.
For
example, “car accident” is a phrase that makes you think of many
different types of vehicle collisions. But if you’re trying to persuade
someone to buy car insurance, you won’t say that there are thousands of
car accidents each day. You’ll say that there are thousands of
car-related deaths every day.
“Death” is a more
powerful word than “accident,” and advertisers use this method every
day in order to convince people to buy products.
Here are some more words that are claimed to be the most persuasive in the English language.
2. Dress up, but don’t talk down.
Nice
clothes go a long way in helping you maintain confidence, even if no
one is around to see you. The nasty side effect is that being the most
well-dressed person in the room can result in talking down or being
condescending to people who are actually above you.
This
is an easy trap to fall into because if we feel like we have the power
in a conversation, we’re more likely to patronize the person by saying
things like, “Oh, well let me explain this to you. It’s really quite simple.” The problem is that if it isn’t simple, or if you’re not communicating well, you’ve pretty much lost them.
Keep
in mind that the person you’re pitching to is above you. They have the
power to say “no.” You don’t want them to realize this, obviously,
because you need to maintain control over the conversation, but talking
down to the person is challenging them to a contest you don’t want to
take part in. Remember that there is a fine line between arrogance and
being assertive.
3. Focus on the future.
Using
future tense is a great way to establish confidence. It helps the other
person know that you are moving forward and ready to carry out what you
promise.
You can do this easily by abusing the word will. Phrases like “We will” and “Then we’ll do this” will get the person used to the idea that this is going to happen.
That
said, don’t be pushy. Try not to make decisions for the other person,
but instead talk about possibilities and the effects of decisions that
can be made.
4. Make yourself scarce.
People
want what they can’t have. Make it clear that this offer you’re
extending to them won’t last for ever, and they will be missing out.
This
especially works if you’re selling a product. Common tactics for
offloading new products is by intentionally making them scarce and rare,
which triggers something in people to “Get it now while you can!”
Here is a great guide on the psychology of scarcity that you can refer to.
5. Choose the right medium for your pitch.
You’re
trying to convince someone to do something they probably don’t want to
do (yet). This means that cultivating the environment for your pitch is
quite essential.
Study the person and determine
how they prefer to communicate. Simply asking them if they like to talk
on the phone instead of email goes a long way, just as long as you give
them some options.
I’ve even come across
people who are more comfortable texting than talking face to face. Keep
this in mind and choose a medium centered around them, not you.
6. Speak their language.
Finishing a person’s sentence is a bad habit to get into. This is because you’re inserting your own “speak” into their independent thoughts.
Who wants to feel invaded?
Listen
closely to how the person talks and watch how they carry themselves.
Choose your own approach accordingly. Do they stray from jargon? You
should too. Do they make jokes and end their sentences with
prepositions? Match that with your own relaxed style.
Even
body language should be matched effectively. If they like to talk with
their hands, that means their ideal form of communication is active, so
it is helpful for you to do the same. If their language is reserved and
closed off (arms are closed, etc), then you know to avoid gestures that
would make them feel uncomfortable.
This
technique is useful for addressing groups of people as well. Try to get a
feel for the room and study what makes people react positively to what
you say. Learn what works and apply it accordingly.
7. Avoid verbal fillers.
Every
time you let “um” or “uh” interrupt your speech, you lose credibility
with the person you’re speaking to. It won’t even matter that what you
have to say is important.
Be clear and let your
speech flow. The best way to do this is by practicing your speech at
home or thinking for a second before speaking.
8. Do something for them.
As
a kid, you probably said something nice to your parents before asking
them for something. Even at a young age, we realize that people are more
likely to help us out if they’re returning the favor for something
we’ve done.
You can do this before you even
pitch anything. If you start off a networking relationship with a favor,
that person will be more likely to work with you later on.
You
should also return the favor, because you never know what’s being
noticed about you. I once recommended a great website on this site,
which was an unsolicited favor. The recipient of this favor was so
grateful for the spike in sales that they sent me free merchandise. I
didn’t ask for it and they definitely didn’t have to, but it cemented a
relationship that could lead to more mutual benefits in the future.
9. Be a master of timing.
This goes along with getting to know the person you’re pitching to. Study them and find out the best time to talk to them.
For
example, some busy executives are swamped during the beginning of the
week and check out mentally on Friday. This means that Thursday may be
the best time to approach a person you need to persuade.
This
is easier if you’re trying to persuade a friend or loved one because
you understand them better. Pick the right timing to talk to them, and
your odds of success will shoot way up.
10. Express your opinion reluctantly.
You want the other person to believe in you. You have all of the answers, but how did you get there?
Talk
about what you used to believe, and what you believe now. Use your own
learning experience as a story that they can model after. By doing this,
you are pacing the conversation/pitch and giving the person assurance
that this will work for them.
11. Repeat what they say.
Prove
that you are listening to and acknowledging the thoughts and feelings
of the person you’re talking to. You can affirm their stance by simply
saying,
“If I’m understanding you correctly,
you’re saying that you find this important because of XY and Z. I
ubderstand that, and think AB and C.”
Trust me, this comes in handy even when you’re not addressing the alphabet.
12. Build to your emotions.
Let
your emotional responses, such as enthusiasm and excitement, naturally
develop during the conversation. Don’t overwhelm the person with a zeal
they don’t feel yet.
In many cases, you’ll want
to wait until the end of your pitch to start sprinkling in the emotion
and passion. This will ensure that it comes across as sincere and
logically founded on what’s already been said.
A
good rule of thumb is to start the conversation on an upbeat but
relaxed note. As you start discussing the topic at hand, gradually grow
more excited and passionate about what you’re talking about. This way,
the person won’t feel like they’re being “worked.” They’ll instead feel
like you are doing them a favor.

0 comments:
Post a Comment